Thursday, November 10, 2011

Fisticuffs

This Public Service Announcement is brought to you by the following sponsors: exhaustion, post-partum rage and a very generous donor who asked to be identified only as "mind your own damned business"!

To the Nosy Nellies out there: I'm going to help you out here and give you a heads up. Please do not say any of the following things to me. Unless you already have. Then please be aware how lucky you are I spared your life and keep in mind I probably won't do it twice.

1. Please do not remind me how "lucky" I am to have the "luxury" of staying home with my babies. Because you're right I am lucky, I'm lucky that I have my priorities in order. I give up a lot of OTHER luxuries to be able to make one income barely stretch work. You too could have this "luxury" you keep telling me you wish you had if other "luxuries" weren't so important. So shut your yap.

2. It is beyond rude to ask me why my kids are "so far apart in age". Would you really like a lecture on reproductive difficulties? Would you like to hear about the baby I lost and the grief I endured? Yes, I know I'm crying now, it's a very touchy subject. Hey were are you going, nice lady at Wal-Mart I've talked to a handful of times while I was trying to buy lightbulbs? YOU asked!**

3. No, actually, I don't think two kids are "enough". My husband and I plan to have our own litter, not that it's any of your dadgum business. But I do hope you took your own advice and stopped at 1 or 2 since you apparently have no manners to pass on to your offspring. Oh I'm sorry, was that rude?

I understand that sometimes people simply have no filter between brain and mouth, but try a little harder folks. Because, let me tell you what, I'm an Irish redneck who hasn't had a full night's sleep in approximately 872 weeks. I'm so close to squaring up and serving you a tasty knuckle sandwich, you have no idea.

**Please understand that if you are struggling with a miscarriage or infertility, I would be honored to talk to you about what we struggled with and offer you real advice and genuine comfort. This section does not apply to you, it applies only to people who can't help but open their mouth about s**t they don't understand because they've never been there.

P.S. The RFML ladies have done this topic before (and done it better, I might add).

1 comment:

I appreciate your comments! Please keep in mind, I demand you be polite to both me and my readers. No insults, swearing or not-nice-ness! :)

Also, I no longer allow anonymous comments.