Wednesday, March 10, 2010

There's always room here for the lonely

I was raised with a pretty hick upbringing. My Mama and my Nany and her kids always introduced me to and kept me interested in country music. My dad introduced me to classic southern rock and they all taught me the finer points of drinking too many beers and being wild, loud and downright crazy. I went to dozens of rodeos where I actually knew the bull riders and the barrel racers. My dream, as a girl, was to live on a farm and be a barrel racer myself. I had a belt with my name scrawled across the back and red Justin Ropers. I knew how to ride a horse and could sing every line to every single Reba McEntire song. I was a proficient camper and knew how to scrounge for fire wood. I'd been potty-trained in the woods at 3 and had slept in many a rainy tent. I wanted to live the life I heard about in those country songs. Small towns, clotheslines, animals, fields and farms.

I got away from that "image" as a teenager. Being a "hick" in NM is sooo not cool. Not that being a weird rocker/skater/goth/freak was "cool" either but being "uncool" in that way was cool. Of course, what I really was was a teenager trying to figure out who she was. I still listened to country music, preferred pick up trucks and guns and drank Budweiser, but now I did it while wearing baggy jeans and Chuck Taylors. That went on through high school and into college. Sometime after college and being married I settled into who I was a bit more. By the time I'd had a baby and moved to Nebraska I was finally very comfortable with who I was.

So who am I? Well I'm a loud girl who loves country music with a ferocious passion. I still wear jeans and Justins and Chuck Taylors, but now I wear skirts sometimes too. I put flowers in my braided hair and dry my clothes on the line. I grow my own vegetables and can catch and clean a fish. I drive a pickup every chance I get and I like to spend all day long at the lake. I still can sing every line to every single Reba McEntire song and I still long to be a barrel racer. I love cows, being outside and two-stepping. I still love to camp and can still pee outside with no problem! I live in a small town where farming, ranching and being neighborly are very important. I feel like I'm very much the person I started my life out being and I'm very happy that way. I don't really care what you call me or how you want to label me. I think I probably fit rather nicely into the "country girl" label and I'm comfortable with that. I know most people strive NOT to be labelled, but I grew up just wanting an ordinary, normal life.

"Well everybody knows me and I know them and I believe that's the way we were supposed to live"
--"Small Town U.S.A." -- Justin Moore

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